04 April 2012 @ 11:28 am
State of the Dio  
Mainly because after two canon updates and Lucciola, the last couple of months have been INTERESTING from the Dio inner mind theater.

OKAY. Dio was apped to camp pretty early on in the series, so didn't need to be truly updated as we worked up to episode 10 since nothing big was going on to really shift his motivations/wants/etc. The only thing was the oncoming idea of Anatoray probably going to be pulled into war soon and Dio knowing this ("I've always belonged on the Silvius. Playtime is over for me now. It was fun flying with you all.") But it was still an upcoming thing, and luckily Dio was told about the timefreeze outside of camp. So it wasn't a huge deal!

Or rather, it was still a thing, but Dio is-- Dio is both an amazing responsible adult when he needs to be and then does what he feels like when he doesn't. Like, seriously, when Dio needs to step up the game and get shit done he is absolutely amazing and dedicated and hardcore and swoon swoon oh Dio, etc. BUT THEN! The glossary talks about how much Dio hates being bound under the command of an army, despite being the Silvius' Vanship team captain. He was with the Sky Pirates because apparently he went off alone as what he claimed to be single reconnaissance. WHICH is true in that Dio integrates himself with the Sky Pirates, helps lead Fam along to the Silvius and such. It ended up being a helpful thing and Dio knows this. So he was actually doing things for the future of Anatoray and probably-- like many in Anatoray as well, information gathering about their new home. But he was always just getting away from what he hated and wanted to go have fun somewhere, too.

When he meets up with Tatiana and Alister they go "to think you ended up with the Sky Pirates," so I'm not sure if Dio checked in with them from time to time. I'm assuming he did in some way every now and then but just. Went right back to what he was doing. So what he did was both part of his job, but also so he could get away from the atmosphere as Anatoray needed to start building up their military force. So it ended up being an even trade in getting the fuck out of the kind of place he felt uncomfortable in, but still taking on responsibilities in another way that was better suited to his approach to and preference of things. Not to mention the Sky Pirates were perfect in their beliefs and free roaming the skies. Freedom is kind of a big fucking deal to Dio hence his dislike of being in a military but mainly because he was finally freed from the last cage he was in at the cost of the life of the most important person to him. And when he feels like it's being jeopardized he's like "LOL NO" because his life and his freedom are precious to him. (there's also a thing about life and death in there and Dio's thoughts on his own life but that's a whole other essay)

So yes, Dio circa episode 10 was pretty okay with things. I say pretty okay because he's not so down with camp being a place he can't leave, even if that feeling is placated some by the timefreeze and knowledge that they're there for a reason having to do with saving their worlds from the monster outside. BUT that reason rolls back to the whole hatred of being under command as well, so it's a little iffy. But camp is just strange, and oddly familiar on the inside sort of like the Sky Pirates where it feels like another vacation of sorts until he goes back home. Also because of the whole Lucciola thing, but that comes later.

So once episode 10 rolled around, Dio started lightsaber fighting and then for the next few episodes was constantly on the run protecting Alvis and killing assassins that came after them. So it wasn't until episode 17 I was able to update him when he and Al finally made it to Boreas with the Allied Forces. Updating him anywhere before that would have been mid-on-the-run-with-Al and would have been absolutely horrible for him to deal with in camp unless she was there with him. Once they reached Boreas, it was a safe haven for a while and Al was around people who would also protect her.

So Dio updated, even though despite Al's temporary safety they were still having conflicts, so he felt uneasy and wondered if he could leave. He hadn't been actively looking for a way out of camp prior, but with the update, developed an uneasy feeling even though he knew about the time thing outside. He still wanted to get back home soon because he was still carrying out the responsibility of keeping Al safe, and his promise to Claus is extremely important to him, so kind of trumped all of his other feelings at the time. And he stayed that way for a few days after that update. It wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been if Al wasn't in a safe place or if he didn't know about how camp worked, so he dealt with it ok.

And then Lucciola came to camp which resulted in basically <_> in terms of MAN IT'D BE NICE TO GO HOME SOON TO FINISH KEEPING MY PROMISE versus. Oh the person I basically love more than anyone is here and alive and oh God feelings feelings everywhere I never want to leave this place. So it was a. Very good thing that Dio was already in a somewhat comfortable place beforehand when it came to being at Boreas and not having to agonize and fight as he had been doing for a good 7 episodes' worth of time straight. Because he would have had INSANE INTERNAL DILEMMAS. He still had a lot of thoughts about it, but since he had tried to leave camp already and couldn't after the update, he knew that he just. Couldn't go home at the time even if he wanted to. So until he was able to, he was like yes. Yes I think I will wait until I can go home, and it's suddenly not nearly so bad anymore now that Lucciola is here.

He had a cycle going on in his head of oh, I feel bad that this is amazing and I never want to leave because I should want to leave and get back to Alvis --> But I can't leave anyway otherwise I would have before Lucciola even came to camp --> LOL IMAGINE IF THAT HAPPENED FUCK I'M LUCKY --> so I feel bad that I can't leave but I kind of maybe secretly selfishly like that I can't because I kind of don't want to. :( --> RINSE AND REPEAT.

If Dio had been in a position where he would have stayed that way, eventually it would have really started eating at him with guilt.

But of course canon ended a couple of weeks later and all was well, so that did not happen since he updated again.

Shit sucked there for a while-- oh shit Grand Exile oh shit giant lasers and people dying errywhere and Dio was injured so couldn't even be the one to bring Al into the Exile itself to find Sara to rescue her. BUT, the Allied Forces were finally joined together in a stronger way than they were, so they prevailed. The war ended. It was pretty much Dio's perfect scenario, he kept his promise to Claus and kept Al safe. Now they could all go home together, and Dio doesn't have to have that feeling of eurgh about the whole being bound under command thing. He's finally free again ('again' being a maybe ... because Travelers has shit happening soon after they arrive on Earth and we don't know what Dio's deal with all of that is yet, so he might not have really had much down time after potential recovery, the poor guy).

So on the canon world/home side of things everything is okay, now. No worries, no need to fly around the world fighting assassins off and getting shot and cut at like mad or anything like that. Dio is content with life back home now because he can go hobo around wherever he wants-- Anatoray with Claus and co or Kartoffel visits to help them rebuild. Grand Races and free skies and joy and joyness.

So in camp he now has nothing to worry about anymore. To boot, with the time thing it's not even like he can decide he wants to stay forever and forever will pass outside. THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT BETTER. So now he can just focus on his life-- which again, is extra important for him. And camp with all of the wacky things Dio had and continues to hear about it basically granted him a miracle by bringing Lucciola to it. Now, like I said in canon everything is super now. Peace, happiness, the works. But as has been showcased in Fam, especially the ending, and as I've even had Dio talk to some people about in camp to an extent - those things are great and Dio appreciates them of course, but for Dio himself it can't be perfect. I FORGET WHICH THREAD HE USED THIS LINE IN LOL but basically there's always something missing for him if he can't share the skies with the one person he's ever wanted to, even though Lucciola is always there in spirit and in Dio's heart.

So in normal canon Dio is happy, but in camp, from that ending, everything feels ... absolutely perfect now because the one thing (in this case person) missing back home to make that ending for him perfect is there. Dio gets to not only work on things he regrets never being able to and sort his feelings out and he's like oh my God Lucciola is by my side again and DIO HIMSELF IS OKAY! And not just okay but the Guild is gone!! He always always hated that Lucciola was never able to live beyond the Guild like he was able to (though he was always thankful and in the Guild itself he avoided treating Lucciola as a servant if he could) and they weren't able to fly into those new skies together. And now they can do that in camp and Dio never imagined he would ever get the chance and it was a regret and ENDLESS SADNESS that was always there hanging over his head.

And with the aforementioned canon ending and things being cool, Dio no longer has to worry about danger zones and bad things being in the process of happening. So now that he's free again to do what he wants, he kind of wants to stay in camp forever with Lucciola. (even though he secretly wishes there was some way to steal him back home to Anatoray with him somehow) Dio always liked camp, but now he kind of loves it because it gave him the one thing he always wanted and is letting him have that chance he always wished he could have. Instead of camp being a place in the way of things he needs to be doing, it's now more like a next chapter in his life after the war in a place where he wants to be.

And then I tried to find a gif to properly sum up Dio right now in camp but there is nothing simultaneously funny, gay, happy, heartwarming and rainbowlike enough to properly convey it. So use your imagination.